Dalmatians

not like this at all

For a brief period in history, God lived on the earth. Leading by example, He built the first house, grew the first plants, and slaughtered the first cow. The proper way of doing things was demonstrated, and everyone was fat and happy.

Next, He turned his attention to the arts. He sang the first song, penned the first poem, and carved the first sculpture. The proper way of doing things was demonstrated, and everyone was beautiful and clever.

Finally, He wrote down everything He knew about the sciences, which was everything. The truth of things was made certain, and everyone was wise and well-read.

But sages continued to enter the house of the All-Knowing, asking inane questions and seeking prophetic knowledge (which could have been theirs if they'd bothered to read the damn book). Leave my home at once, He raged. Those who do not sow are not fit for the fruit. The sages went home, and found their wives, their mothers, and themselves with children.

* * *

Dalmatian-- sesame seed birthmarks; Church-instructed
HD 1; AC as monk; Dewclaw 1d6

The name "dalmatian" comes from the warrior tribe who constitute God's apocalyptic supersoldier army in the late Certainties. They are direct descendants of God, sans opposable thumbs. They're born randomly and rarely, only slightly more common in hamlets amidst the Almer foothills, then immediately handed over to the Church. (Their deformities make them useless to rural families.)

The Almer folk have been in decline for a generation and a half, yet more dalmatians are born each year. This is considered a mixed blessing, as spotted infants can be sold to the Church for a decent sum.

Each dalmatian is trained in a very narrow field of science which becomes their expertise. They can answer any question about their expertise with encyclopedic knowledge bordering on precognition, except for those that start with why? (They are often at odds with contemporary intellectuals, who are very-- perhaps overly-- concerned with why?)

d20 expertises

1. Forest management 
2. Psychoanalysis 
3. Osteology 
4. Mycology
5. Hagiography
6. Forensics
7. Meteorology
8. Imaginary numbers 
9. Carpentry 
10. Shaylese military history 
11. Massage
12. Optics
13. Nephrology 
14. Heliophysics 
15. Demonology (Mammon to Orobas)
16. Wildlife photography
17. CSS styling
18. Geometry (up to six-sided polygons) 
19. Stenography 
20. Wolves

Uneducated dalmatians don't get any special intelligence ability: they tend to burn out and pivot to erotic portraiture. 

When one dies, a terrible windstorm ravages the area for eight days.

like this
but w/o thumbs