6 Axis Alignment (Class: Paladin)

石 子

The holy warrior is chiaroscuro. The higher the contrast, the sharper the cut.

Choose two of the following gods. You're an agent of their ongoing spiritual conflict.

• ULULU, god of fear, silence, and the ocean. 
• OHOHO, god of speech, darkness, and the sky.
• Ululu hoards secrets. Ohoho speaks truths. (They are the wise twins.) 
• ATATA, god of crafts, fire, and the sun.
• Ululu snuffs out flame. Atata boils the sea. (They are the cruel winds.)
• Ohoho hunts by night. Atata hunts by day. (They are the proud hunters.)
• EKEKE, god of love, life, and the earth.
• Ululu rules by fear. Ekeke gathers admirers. (They are the first queens.)
• Ohoho flies. Ekeke crawls on all fours. (They are a comedy duo.)
• Atata works metal. Ekeke shuns tool use. (They are humanity's creators.)

[...so a Cruel Winds Paladin may be called to act when the dry season is particularly harsh, or appear in the days preceding a typhoon.]

Alignment

The gods reward mortals aligned with them in each conflict. One aligns oneself with a god by:

1. Carrying only items that share a letter with their name. (ex. a SWORD for OHOHO)
2. Carrying no items that share a letter with their enemy's name.
3. Saying only sentences that contain a letter in their name.
4. Saying no sentences that contain a letter in their enemy's name.

[...so a Cruel Winds Paladin of Atata can carry a spear but not a javelin, and say "greetings" but not "hello".]

 

While aligned, you have the upper hand against foes of the opposite alignment. [...so a Cruel Winds Paladin of Atata strikes true against creatures aligned with river and sea.] 

If you fall out of alignment, lose your powers until you pray (10min). If it was an honest mistake, you may simply be forgiven.

If you're judged disrespectful (or if they're in a bad mood) you lose your powers until you make a large and appropriate sacrifice: a white cow for Ekeke-comedy, a useful tool for Atata-creator. Also, you can't benefit from armor or cover until you're back in their good graces.

Dual Wielding

You can align yourself with both sides of a conflict by:

1. Carrying exactly as many items aligned with one side as the other (but no items aligned with both). Each weapon only strikes true against foes of the opposite alignment. 
2. Speaking in exactly as many words aligned with one side as the other (but no words aligned with both).

[...so a Balanced Cruel Winds Paladin can carry a dagger and a shield, but not a javelin. Furthermore, if they lose either item, they must throw away the other or lose their balance and fall out of alignment.]

 

 

With careful maneuvering, you can balance all 6 conflicts and wield all 12 powers. 

Powers

ULULU-WISE - Only those you allow to hear you can hear you. To everyone else, you sound like moving water: trickling, splashing, rushing. You are invisible in the rain.

OHOHO-WISE - You can double-speak, saying one thing to one person while another hears something entirely different. In the event you are disarmed, your tongue is literally sharp, silver, and snake-like.

ULULU-WIND - You can grumble like approaching floodwaters, which causes animals to panic. If it is raining, you can summon a torrential rainstorm.

ATATA-WIND - You can breathe fire, simple as. This burns your tongue such that you speak with a lisp.

OHOHO-HUNTER - You can fill a fancy outfit with shadows to make a servant, like those creepy guys from howls moving castle

ATATA-HUNTER - You can combine flame and metal in equal parts to make gold.

ULULU-QUEEN - You obliterate the dead, banishing ghosts, terrifying ghouls, and quieting graveyards.

EKEKE-QUEEN - You can convince any dumb animal to do any simple task. If someone would dislike you, they instead like you too much, to an equally troublesome extent.

OHOHO-COMEDY - You treat capes and gowns as wings, allowing you to glide. You can also talk to birds, but they are rarely helpful.

EKEKE-COMEDY - You can eat rocks like apples and plant the seeds; they'll grow into boulders, then hills, then mountains.

ATATA-CREATOR - You can breathe life into any man-made object older than a hundred years old. It can speak and hop around Beauty and the Beast-style.

EKEKE-CREATOR - Your bare hands and feet are hard as iron and insensate. You are immune to knives.

There are no system neutral rangers

Anyway, here's a system neutral ranger:

• Whenever you go someplace new, its name appears in the dark souls map font. If there is no name, you get to name it, and the gm must retroactively justify the name. (So if the name is valley of gold, perhaps the inhabitants wear lots of gold, or perhaps the valley is simply full of golden flowers.)
• You can speak to places as if they were people. They can answer questions about destroyed landmarks, people who used to live here, and the events of yesterday.
• Forests, old manors, sewer systems: places, like people, have desires. You can learn these by asking. If you fulfill a place's desire, it becomes friendly to you: you never get lost, and always have the home turf advantage.
• In every place, there is a keystone: a person or object holding everything together. (Removing it causes famine, collapse, etc.) You know where to find it. If it's missing, you can give up your character to become a keystone.

[note: there's enough abilities to spread into ABCD templates, but they're not so potent that they can't all fit on a single class in a level-less system]

[also note: this still falls into the third major pitfall of ranger classes, where having 2+ rangers in the party is completely redundant]

[also also note: the personification of places is an abstraction of a ranger's skill at navigating, tracking, and knowing things others don't. No genius loci or nature spirits are required in-setting for these abilities to function]

Here's some locations with the extra bits this class suggests you should have:

• Ono Woods. Wants: The last two bears in the forest to fall in love. Keystone: Not the tallest, but the widest oak. If it's felled, no one will be able to hunt here ever again.
• New Laguarat. Wants: A messiah elected into office. Keystone: The real estate bubble.
• Station 16. Wants: The destruction of the late doctor's research reports. Keystone: The backup generator, which runs life support. 

the Spiceomancy Trading Card Game

This is a productivity game, for when you need a little extra motivation. 

When you complete a task, or a series of tasks, open a booster pack by clicking the button below. Then, save the images to a folder. The more tasks you complete, the more your collection will grow.

Treat these images as physical cards. If you get a second copy of a card, keep both. If you trade cards with a friend, delete your card as you download theirs.

Optional Rule: Bonus Packs If you have three copies of the same card, you can trade them in for another pack. If you have a set of three cards that share a theme (size, color, fungi, etc.), you can trade them in for another pack.

Optional Rule: Rare Cards You can trade in a rare card for another pack, with the caveat that you can only keep the cards that share a theme with the traded rare.

Optional Rule: Big Spender You can give $5 to a charitable cause for another pack. (Here's one.)

For the collectors, there are currently 22 28 common cards, 11 20 uncommon, and 8 13 rare, not including foils.

For the powergamers, please post your decklists below. The meta currently favors Chomik Combo, but the next expansion will probably shake things up.

Update: Oct 3, 2025 - Added 20 new cards to fill out the higher rarities, plus an additional 26(!!!!) submitted by guest artists Morgan Miller, Thorø Murphy, Locheil/Nothic's Eye, VikugnaVikugna, and Archon! These will appear in regular boosters, as well as in the new guest artist packs, for those of you after that chase foil Cool Ant.